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Moving Forward.....

Discussion in 'Freedom from Hell ~ Staying Clean~' started by teach07, Nov 10, 2008.

  1. gettingbetter

    gettingbetter Well-Known Member

    Just saw this SST and you are always in my thoughts and prayers. So much love.
    -dani
     
  2. guinevere64

    guinevere64 Well-Known Member

    Carol... great that you keep Moving Forward.

    much love to you... G
     
  3. teach07

    teach07 Well-Known Member

    Thanks to all for your words of encouragement......looks like we will be moving my father to a long term care facility.......its what we have tried to keep from doing over the last couple of years but the time has come.......he is not doing well at all and the live in caretaker can no longer give him the care he needs......we have found that there are many services that can help us in this process.....resources we knew nothing about until this happened.....my sponsor reminded me that when things flow as they have the last couple of days then in her humble opinion GOD must be involved......I have accepted that this is part of his process of aging ,as hard as it is to see......a sort of peace has been with me that I cant explain.....not that I havent had my moments of fear,anger,grief,etc......however those feelings dont consume me like they once did.....for that I am so grateful and I know that my HP is with me......I will keep yall posted and once again thanks you for you kind words.....


    Much Love..... Carol
     
  4. guinevere64

    guinevere64 Well-Known Member

    I recognize what you're writing about from having helped pack up my in-laws' house last summer when they moved into residential care. Very difficult especially for my husband and his sibs to clean out that house, where their parents had lived happily for 30 years.

    thanks for this today, Carol.... it speaks to my condition. much love, --G
     
  5. teach07

    teach07 Well-Known Member

    We placed my father in a nursing home 2 weeks ago tomorrow.....its a wonderful facility....people are great and the only way you know you are in a nursing home is all the elderly people.....he is doing much better.....still confused and talks about going home but he is participating in the activities....he even played bingo this a.m...........and getting much needed love and care from the staff.....I had forgotten how funny and entertaining my Daddy could be..... and when I leave from my daily visits I am filled with gratitude.......ya know....my sponsor told me last nite that its not the words I speak but the tone of my voice that has changed....funny how we dont notice these changes ourselves... isnt it???? recovery is amazing......God is good...... and vice versa...


    Carol
     
    Last edited: Apr 27, 2011
  6. gettingbetter

    gettingbetter Well-Known Member

    Oh that's so wonderful. Your tone sounds different here, too. It must be so amazing to see him in that environment doing so much better. I hate watching my grandparents decline so I can only imagine how you're feeling about your dad.

    You have been of service Carol ... you have been a dedicated, supportive, and loving daughter ... God needed you and you were right there. I'm so glad you can see the ultimate testimony of your service ... and that it is good.

    So much love
    dani
     
  7. guinevere64

    guinevere64 Well-Known Member

    My husband's family felt this way when they found a good facility for my father-in-law. It was a relief to them to find a place where he could be very comfortable and cared for. I'm glad you're experiencing this with your dad.... love, --G
     
  8. teach07

    teach07 Well-Known Member

    Wow....its been longer than I thought since I posted on my thread......so many things have happened over the last month....I feel like the poster child for the saying life shows up....lets see.......had a water leak in the foundation of my house...the plumber had to use a jackhammer in my kitchen to find the leak and repair it....nothing like 2 big holes in the floor, but homeowners covered most of it ,so all is well.....then my car blew a headgasket and I finally threw in the towel and bought a new one....on the way to pick up the new car my nephew and I were run off the interstate by a fellow who didnt bother to check before he changed lanes and needless to say we wrecked....wasnt as bad a it could have been but it scared the crap out of both of us.... have my new car now and I love it....gets much better gas mileage which is great for my job and its been 12 years since I had a new ride, so I feel like a kid in a candy store when Im cruising around.....as for the situation with my father, there have been many ups and downs......he became very angry for about a week....accused me of stealing his money, etc, etc ( I am his POA)......but have talked to some folks since about dementia and now know that this is normal....I am at peace with where he is today and know that he is being taken good care of.....its a process like everything else....not only for me but also for him....I have to remember this....it aint all about me....then to top it all off my son and I both have had a monster intestinal bug this week.....not something I would wish on my worst enemy..... but we are both feeling much better and ready to settle in for the summer....oh yeah....my son graduated from HS last week, with honors no less.....I am soooooo proud of him I could bust....he will be attending the local college starting this fall and has a job for the summer so hes officially "grownup".... or so he thinks :):)....the most amazing thing of all is that I havent had to get high.......it blows me away some days.....I used for so long I didnt know that I could actually go thru the good times and the challenging times without putting some substance any substance in my body to either mkae it go away and make it better.... if you know what I mean.....so if your reading this and you dont think you can get clean and stay clean when life throws you a few curve balls...... I promise you it can be done....it isnt easy....it doesnt happen overnite......there will be days when you wonder if its worth it.....BUT....if you just hang in there.......reach out for help to others that have been there too....and have faith in something...anything....bigger that yourself....it IS possible....take care all....


    Much Love..... Carol
     
  9. AumuA

    AumuA Well-Known Member

    It is really great to hear you describe these events from a clear headed and balanced perspective. I can imagine what your reaction might be if you were in the grips of using and going through this. The good and the not so good. Your positive perspective is an inspiration!
     
  10. Living Free

    Living Free Well-Known Member

    Hi Carol, how are you doing today? Hoping the injection works. May take a day or so if its cortizone. hang in there and Im thinking about ya.
     
  11. teach07

    teach07 Well-Known Member

    Thanks Lisa......the injections went well.......the Dr. said he was using a long acting steroid.....I cant remember the name of it but it wasnt cortisone....anyway he said what you did.....that it wouldnt really even begin to start woorking for at least 24 hours....I'm willing to wait...I was thinking how fearful I was just 6 months ago to even consider going to a Dr. to help with the pain....all those old feelings wrapped around my many visits to the old Dr to get my drugs.....I simply told this Dr straight up that I was an addict in recovery and NO NARCOTICS.....its amazing how simple that is....also made sure my sponsor and others knew what I was doing......nothing like a little accountability....anyway....I do appreciate you thinking of me....I'll keep you posted over the next couple of days as to how things are going...


    Much love.... Carol
     
  12. teach07

    teach07 Well-Known Member

    Quick update....the injections really seemed to have helped.....we will just have to see how long it lasts......hopefully for a while but like everything else all I can do is a day at a time.....I'll be gone all next week.....my oldest sister is going to have surgery again....first.....a by pass of the subclavian artery and then they will place an endograph in the descending aorta......the Dr was upfront about the risks....he said theres a 20% chance she could have paralysis after the endograph...... I'm doiung my best to remain focused on the 80% chance that all will be well.....keep us in you thoughts if you will......


    Carol
     
  13. Living Free

    Living Free Well-Known Member

    Hi Carol, how are you and your sister doing these days? Hoping everyone is well.
     
  14. teach07

    teach07 Well-Known Member

    Hey Lisa......she is doing well....came thru the surgery aok and is recovering nicely....she thinks she should be further along but has accepted that it takes time to recuperate from what she has been thru....getting ready to return to school....we start really early this year and I like it cause it soooo hot in August here in the deep south, there's not much to do but stay inside and soak up the AC.......hope all is well for you....ya'll have had your fair share of the heat from what I can tell so stay cool and take care......much love and thanks for checking on me.......

    Carol
     
  15. teach07

    teach07 Well-Known Member

    Its been quite awhile since I posted......My sponsor is getting married today......I'll attend her wedding with all my other friends in recovery....thats a blessing.....coming up on 3 years clean next month....still cant believe it some days....some days are better than others.... but thats life.....took a while for me to understand that.....my father is doing well.....being in the nursing home has so improved his quality of life....would have never believed THAT a year ago.......has shown me that the things we fear the most very often turn out to be unfounded.....my son started College....boy has that been an adjustment for both of us....he's still home and going to our local college so I'm trying not to hover too much as far as his work is concerned.....but its hard....letting them grow up and fall down sometimes isnt easy as a parent.... but I'm working on it....hope everyone is doing well....fall has shown up in SE Ga this morning....48 degrees with a high of 74....its a great day for a white wedding..... Carol
     
  16. AumuA

    AumuA Well-Known Member

    Guess you and I are the only ones "Staying clean" these days .. everyone else must be cured, ha ha. Hallelujah it's a miracle! Well congrats on upcoming 3 years. That's one more than 2 years I suppose. It's all just today though, right?

    Now this is stuck in my head: It's a nice day to....START AGAIN.
     
  17. Living Free

    Living Free Well-Known Member

    Wow Carol - 3 years! Congrats...and glad to hear that your dad is doing better these days too. My little one has another good 7 years before college starts - but I certainly understand how hard it can be to hang back and let them learn some lessons on their own :) Enjoy the wedding, luv - L

    "Hey little sister whose your superman?" LOL!
     
  18. guinevere64

    guinevere64 Well-Known Member

    Carol.

    i remember 3 years ago.

    what a long way to come, huh? extremely glad to know you and to witness your recovery. you've helped me so much since november 2008.

    "has shown me that the things we fear the most very often turn out to be unfounded" ... thanks for this. much love, /g
     
  19. teach07

    teach07 Well-Known Member

    Just returned home from having lunch with my father at the nursing home.....he is no longer well enough to be taken out so my sister ,her husband my son and I went to him......made a special dessert my Mama always made and we shared it with others in the dining room.....will pick up my 3 year medallion this Saturday....boy how time flys....I would add when your having fun but dont want to imply that its always fun....its better than it has ever been but life still happens....watching Daddy deteriorate (Sp??) as he has is hard BUT I dont have to use over it......I am grateful that I have reached a place today where my visits to him are out of LOVE and not duty....recovery has given me that.....and I am so grateful for those that came before me to show me life IS possible without using.....Happy Thanksgiving to you all..... Much Love.... Carol
     
  20. guinevere64

    guinevere64 Well-Known Member

    Congratulations on 3 years, Carol.

    Your description of visiting your dad at the nursing home humbles me. Bespeaks a woman free of resentment. much love, /G
     

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