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Need Help on my Journey to Quit Heroin -

Discussion in 'Heroin ~ Addiction and Recovery' started by Nima Faz, Mar 20, 2017.

  1. Nima Faz

    Nima Faz New Member

    Hey Guy and Girls,
    I just wanted to share my situation with you guys and I hope I can get as much help as possible from each and everyone of you. I been on and off of H for the past 1.5-2 years now. I've had trouble getting off and when I do, I'm having trouble staying off. Today I got a new number, deleted all numbers from my phone, and officially have no way to purchase anything even if I wanted to. I've reached the point where my family and my friends are all involved in helping me. If you only knew how many times I've let them down. I believe this is it for me, I haven't been able to get past 3 days recently. As of now I have no choice because I will have no way to mess up. I am a strong person and consider myself very very wise but this drug has got the best of me. Starting today (Monday) the 20th. I am going drug free. I plan to take Suboxone for 3-4 days then completely cold turkey. My symptoms during my kick are Vomitting, Diarhea, Restless Feet/Hands, and more than anything my mind playing tricks on me. Tomorrow through Friday I am going to have to go to work with my dad. He leaves the country on the 29th and I have to operate his business until he is back. (2 weeks) I've read almost anything and everything internet has to offer in regards to kicking. If anyone has any tricks or anything they recommend to make this next 4-5 days easier I would really appreciate it. I'm focused and I'm positive right.now. This is gonna be a way for me to gain my family's trust back while I run the family business. Any tips would be greatly appreciated. Working during my kick wont be easy but I have no other choice. Please advise and please help. I've never done a thread in a forum and asked for help. This is my first time and I hope there's benefits!! Thank you all. Peace and love.
     
  2. peacenik

    peacenik Administrator

    Ok first off congratulations on your determination to quit. I'll tell you, I was on heroin then methadone and had a real hard time getting free but I did make it after many tries. So, though I don't think there is one answer, I have learned a few things.
    One is that there are people who get free - that's why I tell you about my success because after failing a number of times it can seem hopeless. No it's not hopeless but addiction is very strong. It being strong means you must use very strong measures to beat it.

    I was fortunate enough to have gone through rehab three times and that last time it dawned on me that nothing else mattered. I had to make staying clean my number one priority. So that's my most important advice make it your most important thing. So, yes working for your dad is a good thing, will keep you busy. But if it's a burden and you feel you could do it if you just took a little dope, then the work has to go.

    I had to get honest about how serious my problem was - how it affected my life, and start doing things consistently every day that represented the opposite of addiction. Honesty is important, accountability - I went to recovery meetings every day and let people know I was new to recovery and that helped a lot. That's the most available and cheapest way to get a real structure in place to fight this - but there are other ways. The main thing is you get busy doing positive things.

    I'm ok using a little suboxone as a detox drug but take it in diminishing doses 3-4 days is ok, we used to do 5-7 days but whatever you decide, get a schedule for the suboxone and stick to it. Then you stay clean one day at a time. Don't think you can have a few beers, or smoke a little to take the edge off. That never worked for me always led me back. Do it one day at a time, get some people you can share with about your recovery and realize that for an addict a clean day is a successful day. If you get through the day clean that's all that counts right now. Eventually things will smooth out and you can start enjoying life without drugs, all the best to you, I hope you'll check in and let us know how its going. Pretty quiet around here lately but I'll be here :)
    Dave
     
  3. Nima Faz

    Nima Faz New Member

    Hey Dave,
    Thank you for responding. I def need someone I can talk to when I feel weak. I have way too much love around me so it's hard to talk to them because they feel so bad it either stresses them out or makes them angry. So it's hard to talk to them about my kick I'm currently almost done with my first 24hrs. What's your best advice to go through these next couple of days. The worst part is mornings I got wake up at 530am and work until 6 while I am kicking. It's so hard man dealing with the mornings barely being able to even walk let alone work. I am dealing with the mental aspect of it more than anything the addict me is so much stronger than ME me. He's like in total control of my body and it makes me mad. I could be hurting horrribly but if I decide to go pick up I get energy out of no where even before I have relapsed. Just knowing I'm about to get some gives me energy. So I'm trying to over power my mentality and not let the addict me take over. If there is anything you know that will help me get through the day. Please advise.
     
  4. Nima Faz

    Nima Faz New Member

    My email is nzolmajdi@gmail.com if you can or want to shoot me your number I would love to have someone to talk to.
     
  5. peacenik

    peacenik Administrator

    This touches on all the stuff I was taught at rehab, they ponted out as far as the mental goes that your addiction lies to you, tells you all will be ok if you just take a little. The truth? All will be screwed up if you continue to take drugs, So thats a tool - think the drug through. Dont think of the high, think about what happens afterwards, when you are sick and have no money, when you've let down your friends and family yet again. If you do that the drug loses some of its power - and this works!
    Dave
     
  6. Nima Faz

    Nima Faz New Member

    Dave, I'm actually about to fly out to my sisters in napa valley I don't know anyone there and I plan to stay for 5 nights I'm very excited to come back with my brain at least working again!
     
  7. peacenik

    peacenik Administrator

    sounds good. Hang in there and check in when you can. One step at a time.... :) Dave
     

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