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You stayed clean today! GREAT! Tell us how!

Discussion in 'Freedom from Hell ~ Staying Clean~' started by selfwilly, Sep 12, 2004.

  1. arlenewla

    arlenewla Well-Known Member

    Congratulations, Wisconsin!!![8D][8D]

    Yup...your friend is your Eskimo. Would have loved to have been in Best Buy to hear this conversation. G-d is always where She belongs at just the right time. No coicindences, huh?:)

    Arlene F.
    Exodus From MMT;12-25-02
    <center>THIS TOO SHALL PASS</center>
     
  2. oneis2many

    oneis2many Well-Known Member

    In my 6th week, (43 days).

    Some parts of some days I am white knuckling it. Then I remember to ask G*d to intervene and It is done.
    This forum is such a huge part of my recovery this time. And I want it so much I can taste it!
    When I need to slow down and take it one hour or one minute I do that, too.
    Feels good to feel good, know what I mean?

    when the fear of staying the same is greater
    than the fear of change
    ...we change
     
  3. abu6000

    abu6000 Guest

    yoga class. I'm a guy so there is alot of things there to help my endorphines flow...
     
  4. Jack Butler

    Jack Butler Well-Known Member

    Now here's a topic that can take you all over the map. And the cool thing is... there's no wrong way to stay clean. :D

    Today I stayed clean because I stayed out of the places and away from the people who let me think it's ok to cheat on my recovery. I tried to focus on positive, life-affirming thoughts and actions. But I also remembered where I came from, and allowed myself to be grateful I'm no longer there. I gave myself permission to be human and to make mistakes, as long as they didn't involve using. It's almost the end of the day now, and it's worked all day so far. The preceding 11 months have been drug-free because of some variation of the things I just mentioned, and occasionally one or two things I've picked up from friends, or in a past NA meeting. Since I don't have a lot of options for NA meetings right now, and the closest SOS meeting is half a days drive away, I'm considering AA meetings as a stop-gap measure. I'm not sure how I would fit in, but still, I'm considering it. I have attended 12-step meetings in the past, and I have the literature to remind myself of that. I read that literature. I go online and read what others have to say about staying clean. When I feel like I might not sound too stupid, I say something myself. I remember the people and things that drugs have taken from me. Sometimes I think of them and cry, but I don't use. And I cry less as the days go by. I tell myself that things can only get better. Then I consider the power of movement, and I seek out ways to make them better. Movement really helps with the depression thing too. Harder to hit a moving target I guess. I think of friends I've had in recovery. And though most of them are half a continent away, I take some measure of comfort in knowing that I may one day be able to spend time with them again. I try to stay "right size" and teachable too. You know, not too big for my breaches nor to small to carry my own weight. I can't tell you about God or higher powers. I'm pretty damaged in that area, and my recovery requires that I don't go around spouting concepts and ideas that I don't fully understand. I can tell you that I remain open-hearted.

    I recently received some scary news from my doctor. Nothing conclusive at this stage, but he's got my attention. And you know what? It's going to be ok regardless of the outcome. I don't have to use. I don't even want to. It's ok to be vulnerable and imperfect. I don't need be self-indulgent or self-pitying. Just self-respecting and self-nurturing. If you knew me and what I used to be like, I think you'd be smiling right about now. Miracles can occur, even in the unlikeliest of places. By hanging in there, not using, cleaning house, lightening up a little bit, and being open to the possibilities, I've been allowed to see that.


    jb


    May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
    -George Carlin
     
  5. fenderman

    fenderman Well-Known Member

    Okay...day 15 clean from opiates....woooooooooooooo....I got my personality back and doing great. I go to my N/A meetings which are awesome. We are all the same....God's children.....period!!!!

    "Remember, your worst day not using, is better than your best day using!"
     
  6. karmakat

    karmakat Member

    I have not counted the number of days i have been opiate free I just hate numbers Example: i dont weigh myself! Some days are hard Some days i miss not having any pills to take I started taking nutrients from this book I read about our bodies being low in natural substances- IT helped greatly with giving me energy and helping with some depression i was feeling I did not want to go the Sub route and i did the cold turkey methadone route So that drug will never be an option for me-- Not judging anyone else Please, understand whatever gets you thru--- I might not post often but i am here everyday Thankful for a site like this Karma
    "sometimes the only way is goodbye"
     
  7. arlenewla

    arlenewla Well-Known Member

    Damn fine stuff, Jack!

    What you wrote about being right sized...out of the arrogance. The old "don't you know who I think I am" state of mind is a tremendous realization.

    You know....each year on Passover....Jews eat freaking matzoh for 8 days. I hate matzoh. It upsets my stomach in ways that aren't pretty. But the importance of matzoh in my life is that's its unleavened. It's not puffed up. Its plain...and unadorned. The most basic of sustenances.

    I have found "teachability" to be my biggest ally in recovery...my greatest strength. Hard for me to comprehend....if you had known me 5 years ago. I was the "right-ess" person on the planet. Couldn't tell me sh*t.

    With openness....willingness....I sally forth. Into the great unknown of daily living. Quite vulernable...sometimes almost fragile....missing the mark. But out of the self-pity. No longer a victim in my own mind.:)

    Arlene F.
    Exodus From MMT;12-25-02
    <center>THIS TOO SHALL PASS</center>
     
  8. wanttoquitnow

    wanttoquitnow Well-Known Member

    Everyday I read this message board. I have almost 30 days and am feeling really really good. I have been forcing myself out of the house (trying to beat my depression.......its working). just wanted to THANK EVERYONE. THIS FORUM HAS REALLY HELPED ME AND I DONT THINK ID BEEN ABLE TO DO IT W/O SOMETYPE OF SUPPORT. THANKS. JUST READING ABOUT EVERYONE ELSES LIVES HELPS ME. got to get back to house-chores. I will be reading tonight and tomorrow.....looking for all of your posts!!
     
  9. hopefien

    hopefien Well-Known Member

    I never thought i would be capable of puttting a day of clean time toghther, and once i did, i wondered how do i stay so? I always used to say thank god I am not that into alchol cause i could never stay sober as alchol is so easy to get, imagine having heroin in every corner store. Well gueess what? There could be heroin at the corner store and i would be fine. By working the steps i have had a spiritual awakening and as the book tells me i can safley go anywhere. I am not a glum person either! The simple, not easy, but simple program of action set forth by bill w and others in the big book of alcholic anymous is the path to permnanent cleaniness and more importantly happiness. Do you have years of clean time yet you are still restless irratible and dicontented? It does not have to be that way. you can stay clean and be happy, by following a few simple requirments. Anyone who is intrested in more should find an AA big book meeting, or contact me. Staying clean is simple, one day at time living by spirtual rules that remained unchanged and worked for millions for over 70 years. THERE IS A SOLUTION! [:x)]
     
  10. arlenewla

    arlenewla Well-Known Member

    Oh, honey...have we got a thread for you!:D

    A hearty welcome...you came on with one damn fine post.[8D]

    Arlene
    Exodus From MMT;12-25-02
    <center>THIS TOO SHALL PASS</center>
     
  11. Rip This Joint

    Rip This Joint Well-Known Member

    Hope, with a capital H.

    Free since 1/28/08
     
  12. Chocky

    Chocky Well-Known Member

    Following the heart, not the head.

    Getting Humble, and asking God for a hand.
     
  13. slingblade

    slingblade Well-Known Member

    I stayed clean today by not using any dope. God didn't do it. I did. Maybe God will help tomorrow, but I'm not counting on it.

    Where do I go now that I've gone too far?
    -GoldenEarring
     
  14. Parachute

    Parachute Well-Known Member

    I stayed clean today by the Grace of a HIGHER POWER..by being part of the infinite universe. ACCEPTING that I don't control anything, but what I do, How I act. I have my part. I stayed sober today by being grateful just to be PART OF..big or small, terrific or awful..I GET TO live today.
    I stayed clean today cuz when I am clean I HAVE CHOICES. For so many years I never had a choice. That keeps me clean just for today.

    Tomorrow, I will wake up, and seek WHATEVER it is I need to seek, to stay clean one more day.

    PEACE

    All Best
    P
     
  15. slingblade

    slingblade Well-Known Member

    You're trying to be helpful Parachute, and I appreciate it but I'll wake up tomorrow and probably stay clean and sober too. Every morning I face the same choice that you do. I just don't think begging God for anything makes much difference.

    Where do I go now that I've gone too far?
    -GoldenEarring
     
  16. Parachute

    Parachute Well-Known Member

    Lots of CONSECUTIVE right choices bring me to a new place....a new way of living, thats all. It works for me....
    I don't beg anything of anyone or any entity. I reach for support, I reach for help, HELP COMES..EVERYTIME..I continue to get better.


    PEACE

    All Best
    P
     
  17. slingblade

    slingblade Well-Known Member

    Sometimes help isn't available and you just have to do it yourself. I haven't found any HP source of much help yet.


    Where do I go now that I've gone too far?
    -GoldenEarring
     
  18. Parachute

    Parachute Well-Known Member

    Feel Better Mike..Happy New Year..

    PEACE

    All Best
    P
     
  19. slingblade

    slingblade Well-Known Member

    Thank you. I hope 2009 is good to you.

    Where do I go now that I've gone too far?
    -GoldenEarring
     
  20. painful pill

    painful pill Well-Known Member

    I looked at single available girls profiles on myspace, picked a nice one to look at and thought, hmm, to meet and date that stranger, i have to be somebody. i have to have my head on straight. i have to have humor and energy, or at least enough energy to fake it. im not quite healed yet, at day 19, but its getting better. pretty soon, i'll date again or at least start talking to girls with that intention, while also trying to make some guy friends, but its a lower priority. i guess it comes from grade school urges. i had guy friends if i wanted but girls were impossible.

    screw NA's 6 month rule on new relationships!!! but i'll keep goin to meetings. my sponsor doesn't hold me to that rule.

    ...I must keep reminding myself of this. Be patient. Wait it out. Gonna wait it out...
     

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